


Our Oral History

by BurrSquee, Tikor



Series: Castebook: Changing Moon [6]
Category: Exalted
Genre: Combat, Gen, Lunars, Roleplaying Character, Worldbuilding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-06
Updated: 2017-12-06
Packaged: 2019-02-10 05:54:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12905508
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BurrSquee/pseuds/BurrSquee, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tikor/pseuds/Tikor
Summary: An ancient entry in the Lunar Oral History of Lilith's first and last entry to the Heaven-and-Earth Invitational.





	Our Oral History

**The Invitation**  
Lilith stands in the middle of her garden in Meru, practicing her art as she always is. ‘One can never be too good’, said Ingosh Silverclaws to her, ‘when you grow complacent, you will lose’. So she practices, vowing to never become complacent. She moves slowly and gracefully through her stances, precision in every move that she makes. There is beauty to martial arts, a spectacular dance of power and agility that is always performed. This dance is what she is known for, and she revels in it.

She drops her position when she hears a noise behind her, subtly preparing for a fight. She was too deep in her movements to notice anything around her. That is a very dangerous thing to do in this place, even when everyone else thinks of it as peaceful. There is always danger here, especially for Lilith. Especially when Desus comes closer.

Desus walks towards her down the grass expanse. As always, she has warring emotions where Desus is concerned. She feels herself wanting to be closer to this man that she loves, but she also feels the tension inside; waiting for the next blow. What will his actions be today? She attempts to keep her face serene as he places his warm hands gently on her shoulders, trying to will away the stiffness in them.

“As lovely as ever,” he says, smiling down at her. His face is beautifully lit in the mid-morning sun. No one will ever be able to say that Desus isn’t a beautiful man. Dangerous, but oh so beautiful. He carries himself in the way of a successful and storied man, with the slightly weathered face to match.

Lilith looks out over the scene before her. Outside of her gardens, she can see the city of Meru spread before her. She can see the many little cities, as they sprawl below on the base, their people and weather as different as the whims of the Solars that rule them. She can even hear music coming from the Singing Gardens. It is truly a beautiful sight to behold. When she turns back to say as much, he doesn’t look out at the city as it spreads before him, but down at her. She can feel a small flush come to her cheeks at the compliment he’s given her and their proximity, even after centuries together. 

He bends his head and places a delicate kiss on her lips. It is times like this that remind Lilith so strongly of their early days of marriage, when everything was easy and beautiful between them. When being with Desus made her feel like she couldn’t breathe for the sheer wonder and excitement of it all. Where they solidified their status as a truly “perfect” couple, to be emulated and admired. She longed for those days, when her entire life was bathed in his golden light and love. But those days are gone now. Right now however, with his lover’s touch, she could almost forget.

“I need to ask you a favor,” Desus says, his thumb brushing against the apple of her cheek.

“Hmm?” she hums as she leans into his hand.

“I need you to fight in the Heaven-and-Earth Invitational,” he murmurs, kissing the edge of her jaw.

“I didn’t know the fighters had already been announced for next round,” Lilith sighs, tilting her head up. “I’d be honored to accept such an invitation, though.”

“Not next round, this year’s,” he says, voice against her ear.

The sentence pulls her truly back to the conversation now. She straightens her head to look at him in his pale blue eyes. He couldn’t be serious.

“I thought the candidates for this quarter century had already been chosen,” she says, looking down at his chest and fiddling with the collar of his shirt, trying to diminish any challenge she may be presenting with her question.

“I pulled a few strings,” he says smiling his devilish smile. A smile assured in its power. A smile to truly fear.

“Oh,” she says lamely, brushing away invisible dirt from his immaculate clothing. Collars of Dawn’s Cleansing light were a standard in his wardrobe. “Someone must not be too happy about my taking their place,” she says, trying to add laughter into her voice. Lilith makes the mistake of looking up at him again, into his shrewd eyes. There is very little she can hide from Desus.

“I thought you’d be happy about this.” This is a warning.

“I am, I truly am,” Lilith says quickly, trying to keep herself from scrambling in her head. “I just… I wonder if I’m actually going to be prepared for this fight. I’d have trained much harder these last decades, with the fight less than a seven day away I may not be prepared for that degree of competition.”

“Why would that be a problem?” Desus laughs, his hands tightening on her shoulder. “You are superb at your White Reaper Style, everyone knows it.”

“This is very true,” she says with a nod of her head and a small smile on her lips. She could feel herself relaxing and warming to his idea. Maybe she could do this. But White Reaper is not a dueling style, it is meant to elevate a martial artist to the level of an army.

“Of course you can! You should never doubt yourself,” he says, kissing her on the forehead. “And even if you don’t win, you will put up a valiant effort.”

“But you think I can win right?” Lilith asks. There is a stillness of his face. She may not be able to hide anything from him, but centuries of marriage and constant vigilance has made him much easier to read as well.

“I have no doubt that you will make it to the final round.”

Lilith nods and waits. There is something else here, and he’ll tell her on his timing. The wait is short.

“There is another reason for you to be in the invitational. I know the Solar in the other block who is likely to win, Wellspring of Violence. He’s young, but a good fighter. You are most likely going to face him in the end; I need you to fight him, to fight well but to lose to him,” he says, looking deeply into her eyes. “For a vote in the Deliberative. I have a wager of import.”

She can feel the Mask of White Jade fall over her features, hardening them and making them unreadable, all before she can think of anything else. This is a risky maneuver on her part, but hopefully he won’t retaliate for it later. She’s not supposed to hide things from him. He never finds out what she successfully hides… but what he finds out she pays for.

“I see,” she says coolly.

“You’ve read this year’s Mandala Accords, haven’t you? This young man has a rider that a win would bolster. And it’s even utopian in intent. This vote could change the lives of many mortals; improve them beyond what they even know now. Just by losing this one little fight, you’d cause widespread joy and prosperity over all of Creation. What is one loss compared to that?”

Lilith nods as she takes in his words. She hadn’t been reading Deliberative laws, passed or drafted, for decades now and he knew it. Pointing it out was meant to make her feel uninformed, stupid, even. She notes that he’s using his speech voice for this, the one he saves for cajoling others into doing what he wants. Maybe she should consider it an honor that he feels the need to use it on her, knowing what he’ll say next.

“Plus you’d be doing this for me,” Desus murmurs, bending down to kiss her cheek. “I need you to do this for me.”

And with that, Lilith knows that she can deny him nothing. He _needs_ her. Of course she’ll do this for him. Everything is so easy to understand when Desus is right there.

Of course, things are not nearly as simple when he is away.

 **The Tournament**  
For all of her time on Meru and for all of her time with Solars, Lilith feels that she would have been prepared for the opulence and splendor of the heavenly city. But nothing has prepared her for Yu-Shan. The artistry present in every facet of the Circus Radiant is leagues beyond what she has seen from any Solar architect. With murals on the ceilings that seem to come to life as you walk by, orichalcum that shines and shimmers like the sun itself on every surface, and more jade in the tiles then would be found in the whole of creation. The Circus Radiant is truly a place for the gods.

Lilith can hear the very heartbeat of the colosseum above her as she walks with Desus through the tunnel-like antechamber towards the arena floor, where she is to be introduced with the rest of the beginners bracket. The ground seems to pulse with the lifeblood of the crowd as its shouts and chants ebb and flow, crashing like the waves of the sea. Lilith knows that for all her attempts, she cannot be anything but tense. She has never battled before a crowd like this before, and Desus was counting on her.

It is when they step into the glittering sunlight of the colosseum floor that Lilith can see the colosseum itself. For all the noise that the crowd is making, she can see that many seats are vacant. Most longstanding patrons of the the invitational do not come for the beginners. They spend their time reveling in the many wings that exists off of the main seating area. Lilith almost jumps when she feels Desus put his hands on her shoulders, causing her to turn around.

As always, he chooses to flout tradition, this one stating that combatants enter the arena alone or with only their fellow combatants. But they wouldn’t be the epitome of love if rules weren’t being broken around them, because of them. They stand just beyond the antechamber, their feet on the grass that borders the enormous coliseum floor. She feels that the crowd has seen them, that the image of the two of them is being broadcast on screens for all to see. When Desus cups her face in his hands and kisses her with an all-consuming passion, the crowd roars their approval.

“You will do marvelously,” he says to her, his hands still cupping her jaw. Those are the words he says, but he eyes say a different story. He knows of her combative nature and of her competitive desires. His eyes convey his meaning, that there is one reason to be here and that she, Lilith, must comply with it. She is here to lose the Heaven-and-Earth Invitational. There is a moment when Lilith feels that she must have stopped thinking or breathing or seeing, because suddenly Desus is before her again and he is smiling at her sweetly. 

“It’s time to go,” he says. Lilith nods her assent as she turns to leave. His hand moves down her arm as she walks away, their fingers grasping momentarily before they separate. Lilith makes her way to the fighting arena, to wait among the others on the Jade floor. A gong sounds, and the crowd explodes in sound. The fighters acknowledge the crowd before moving off to wait their turn in a private antechamber. Two names are called, and those fighters re-enter the arena. Another gong that sends the fighters forward, the crowd cheering as their blows clash. The Heaven-and-Earth Invitational has begun.

 **The Early Rounds**  
Her ascent to the finals was a breeze, hardly any martial artist of note. Esoteric styles, sure, or powerful ones wielded by inexperienced fighters. Entering in the beginner’s bracket was Lilith’s advantage, gained from declining the Heaven-and-Earth Invitational for centuries. It wasn’t until a fighter’s third entry they were considered a veteran, ten times to become favored, and fifty in the ‘experienced’ bracket, colloquially known as the ‘sunset’ bracket. Any who won the tournament were barred from re-entry, an unofficial rule of the committee who invited combatants, to keep the event exciting and unpredictable. This restriction bestowed a stigma to combatants in their fiftieth entry or higher. They were slighted by tournament followers no matter how well their prior showings were or who they had previously defeated. 

Watching each match were martial artists whose skill was far beyond the fighters in the arena, Lilith included. They had won their tournament centuries ago, such as While the Ax Falls who kept just how far he had progressed since his win such a secret that he’d been known to slay his opponent’s ghosts after he vanquished them. 

The veteran bracket lead to the favored in the semi-finals, and the experienced with the beginner’s. The smart money was usually on the winner of the favored bracket to win, with most of the rest betting on an upset from the lesser-known veteran’s bracket. The experienced fighters’ previous losses and flaws were too well-known to believe they would overcome all comers, like the god Kokage, master of the Forceful Declaration style, whose nature does not allow him to back down from any taunt. The beginner’s were too unknown to gather many wagers, though they were heavily watched. Every one of Lilith’s matches was sold out. 

Scalpers skyrocketed the price of entry to veteran Solar Wellspring of Violence’s match against the young, favored Sidereal Jannaj. The young Night Caste wielded his Shining Single Point Shining Into the Void style with the mark of someone who had seen that point sparkling from within the Void itself. Maybe he had. The Chosen of Battles initially won the upper hand in the fight with her Prismatic Arrangement of Creation style, but in the end proved too fragile to trade blows with her hardy opponent, even unfairly. Taking the punishment Wellspring of Violence had from Jannaj was something Lilith could respect in a fighter. Of course, the magic of the Circus Radiant had miraculously healed Wellspring Of Violence’s injuries ahead of his match with Lilith. He’d be at full capacity, as the arena of the Unconquered Sun would permit nothing less.

 **The Final Fight**  
The Circus Radiant roars for the final match. Half the Deliberative is in attendance, and no few Dragon-Blooded who oversaw major domains, each surrounded by their posse of mortal retainers. But they are just a smattering of spectators among the godly crowd. Ever-Scintillating Glory, the Daimyo of Sacred Materials, reflects the light from the Circus Radiant’s dome of pure sunlight, chatting with the Jade Maidens and the Gods of the Celestial Sacred Metals. They never miss the chance to comment on the weapons and armor that enabled the victor. Parad, the Left Hand of Power, had cheered on every Dragon-Blooded and god-blooded entrant. Lilith had heard he was too proud to sell his finals ticket bought in advance even after none of his domain had made it to this match. Even the Maiden of Battles and the Unconquered Sun are in attendance, no doubt costing them status in the Games of Divinity to the less martial Incarna who chose to continue play. Of course, Luna could be here in any form, so it was hard to tell if she was watching or not. All Lilith could tell is that her patron goddess had not announced her presence by assuming one of her well-known forms. Altogether, they are a small city’s worth of spectators. Wellspring of Violence raises his hand to the crowd, his katana securely sheathed. His toned arm is uncovered, as his gi ends at his shoulder. On his walk from the gated entrance to the center of the arena, his bare feet kicks up a light dust from the packed earth, imported from Creation. His black, straight hair is bound at the back of his head in a no-nonsense style. Lilith had seen all of this before. She’d watched each of his prior matches, ever since Desus told her she would be fighting him in the finals. How Desus knew, she didn’t want to know.

Lilith herself stands stock-still in the center of the Circus Radiant. She had stretched and prayed and meditated prior to entering the arena by wing through an upper window from Yu-Shan’s skies. Outside the Circus Radiant shone Jupiter’s stars as she lead in the Games, giving power to great secrets. Nothing else needed done; she is ready, and her spear, Selenic Slice, is always ready. Only her eyes move, to take in Wellspring of Violence’s movements, and that of the officiant god, Swordsong. Kokage, Master of Duels, the very same that lost every tournament since the beginning, was the natural choice to officiate. But in his confidence he had abdicated that post to enter himself, thinking he would watch over the second and each beyond. Now he was honor-bound to continue to enter, to back up his boasts, and still powerful enough to demand an invitation each quarter century. Stories of the Heaven-and-Earth Invitational often confused Swordsong for the god over Kokage’s domain; he had lost no small amount of prayer to her ‘temporary’ substitution, now in its third millennium. 

Swordsong lets cry her signature twang of clashed metal, which signals the start of the fight. Cheering erupts from the packed house, but Lilith can barely hear them. Wellspring of Violence holds his hand on his katana’s hilt, not even drawing his weapon. Lilith knows that his iaido style is deceptive, and treats him as fully ready as she charges, leaping to strike at his unarmored chest with her Falling Scythe Flash. The katana blinks out of its sheath, knocking Selenic Slice aside. As it does so, the brilliant lights of the arena go dark, at least to Lilith’s eyes. The brilliant Orichalcum katana seems to shepherd the light, draining it into that black Soulsteel sheath. Lilith dodges Wellspring of Violence’s counterblow by sound alone.

Scrambling for distance and shaking her head, Lilith’s vision returns. She turns her head to see Wellspring of Violence advancing at a run, katana held above his head with two skilled hands, rays of light binding it to its sheath. Lilith attempts to parry, but misses. She wills the Impenetrable White Shroud around herself and Hollow, her moonsilver breastplate, but even then his blow cuts her, only keeping his strike from more cutting deeply into her side.

Lilith swings Selenic Slice in an arc where Wellspring of Violence’s head used to be. But she knew he’d dodge that aspect of her attack. The tip of the spear finishes its swing in the dirt, and Lilith vaults off of it, her body upside down, her foot landing on the Solar’s chest, kicking Wellspring of Violence a short distance. She takes a moment to call on her Essence to erase the previous strike, Halting the Scarlet Flow and mending the resulting bruise with a flash of moonlight even the highest seats can make out. In that moment, Wellspring of Violence returns, eyes wide, in an all-out attack.

Lilith leaps above his strike, then, once airborne, throws Selenic Slice from deadly close range. It pierces nothing but shadow, as Wellspring of Violence’s form changes from that of a man to seven shadows cast by the absent figure of that man. Lilith, too, changes forms, taking her spirit’s shape, that of the stryx, flapping out of Wellspring of Violence’s range to retrieve her weapon in her claws. Once re-armed, she reverts to her human shape. They had now traded places and blows, but neither looked close to finished.

Lilith performs the kata of the White Reaper, taking its form into her movements. Wellspring of Violence chooses to enter the stance of the Single Point Shining Into the Void instead of pressing his attack. It pleases Lilith that she had kept him from doing so at the very beginning. The crowd’s noise ratchets upwards, for they knew the martial spectacle will only heighten as this new Essence enhances each fighter.

When Lilith closes to strike with her spear, Wellspring of Violence’s katana moves so quickly he strikes twice for each of her swings - and she has the snake’s quickness within her. She does her best to parry and dodge while looking for an opening, but while deflecting one strike, her arm is marked by the next. If not for her shroud she might have lost the limb. She bleeds once again into the dirt of the Circus Radiant. 

This time Wellspring of Violence does not allow them to be separated, keeping Lilith embattled. But while he is so close Lilith sees her opening. The light that binds the sheath to the katana moves with Wellspring of Violence’s hands where he holds the katana’s hilt. At times, it is well within Lilith’s striking range. So she parries one overhead strike of her opponent’s with the butt of her spear, and thrusts her spear point into that brilliant stream. To her delight, it brakes and shimmers away. The announcer goes wild, and so does the crowd. 

On Lilith’s own form a halo of light adds itself to her shroud of protection. She feels its power feed the shroud, and the light of it shimmers with potential. By comparison, Wellspring of Violence’s next swipe of his katana has slowed to merely exceptional. This fight, as she had made it, Lilith felt she could twist into a win, even wounded. If only Desus had not bound her to losing. 

By this time, Lilith has bled from her arm down to the hilt of her spear, Selenic Slice. This is how she preferred to fight, in the blood and the dirt with a worthy opponent. She strives to forget the crowd and the rules and the prize of mere glory instead of a bloody, still-beating heart. But she cannot, she has promised. On the next exchange Lilith stretches Wellspring of Violence out with a severe parry of his katana. His leg, supporting his awkward weight, straining for balance, won’t be able to move out of her next strike. Lilith points her spear-tip at the artery she knew beat there, but instead of slicing it open, she misses. As her spear strikes the dirt she leverages it, tripping the Solar instead.

To Lilith’s surprise, as the Solar loses his footing he wildly slices upwards at her, using his own falling weight for power. She tries to pull back, but the very tip of the katana slices her cheek, nose, and forehead. Blood shoots out from her head-wound, spraying the downed Solar. Lilith sees only red. She spares a hand from her spear to wipe away the gore blocking her vision. As she does she hears Swordsong call out, “Cease the match! I declare Wellspring of Violence the winner!” Which, as she had been marked three times without marking her opponent in return, is consistent with the Heaven-and-Earth Invitational’s custom. A skunk, they call it. It is to keep the fights from dragging on against hardy opponents, and boring the high company with the superior fighter’s cruelty. But, as Lilith hears the delighted cheering of the crowd, she feels like she kept the fight going long enough to be entertaining. None but the true masters are likely to have seen her hesitation.

 **The Aftermath**  
Slowly, as though from a dream, Lilith comes back to herself. The match is over and she is standing in the middle of the stadium. She feels her skin knit together, healing itself as is the tradition of the invitational. But even as the skin is flawless again, Lilith can feel the wounds like a phantom pain. Her mind racks at the final match, trying to remember the salient details of it. She lost to Wellspring of Violence, this is evident as the crowds cheers his name. She smiles as Wellspring of Violence and Swordsong comes over to stand by her and offer amicable conversation, which is another tradition of the Invitational. With a smile and a small headnod, Lilith heads towards her end of the colosseum, waving and smiling at the crowd as she walks out.

It is when she is alone, and out of the sun, that she feels herself deflate. It is not just disappointment in losing, which would happen to any fighter on this field that made it as far as Lilith has. It is the way she lost that bothers her the most. She knows that the most damaged part of her is her own pride. The pride in her martial art. A pride that revels in the beauty of a true match, where skills are put against skills with no holds barred. Where both can be proud of the fight that is given, either before a crowd or the great goddess herself. But this is not a fight that she can be proud of.

The moment comes back to her as in a haze, heavy on her soul. The moment when she could have turned the tide on the battle. The moment where she could have marked Wellspring of Violence, even if it had only been once. It would have meant that she fought her true best. She _could_ have won that fight. She could have won her first Heaven-and-Earth Invitational. But the moment leaves her as quickly as it comes, and it leaves Lilith feeling confused and shaky.

She shakes herself and wills her features to be happy. She knows that she must find her husband soon, or he will be the one to come looking for her. These emotions would do nothing but add abuse onto an otherwise disappointing day. She walks the near empty pathway towards the Solar antechambers, passing servants and lesser patrons along the way. She takes one more breath to steady herself before she enters the Eclipse vestibule, the party having spewed into the entrance hall by the sounds behind the door. As she pushes open the door, she can’t help but be surprised at the sheer number of people waiting for her. People begin to spot her, and shouts of congratulations meet her. Even though she lost, she was still impressive out there, or so she later gathers from the spectators.

“My glorious wife!”

She turns around from thanking someone who caught her as she was making her way deeper into the halls. She sees Desus come to her, breaking free of his own hangers-on. Before she can even say a word, Desus takes her by the shoulders kisses her, lifting her off her feet, much to the delight of the onlooking crowd.

“You fought well and made me proud,” he says, as he drapes an arm around her shoulder and steers her deeper into the crowd and into those who were with him before. She knows most of them, Bright Shattered Ice in her storied wings, Chuzei Manansei dressed at the height of fashion in a restrictive kimono, and his circle’s vizier, Undertow of Fate, looking far into her cups. That they are all female does not surprise Lilith. 

“I see you’re all patched up,” he says, a finger brushing her cheek where the cut would have been.“Praise be unto the Unconquered Sun!” he says as the drink that has just reentered his hands is lifted up.

Lilith tries not to notice the glances she receives from Bright Shattered Ice as Desus begins expounding to the others that have begun to join his group. For all the years she has been married to Desus, she knows that Bright Shattered Ice still dislikes her greatly. This is not a time when Lilith wants to be in attendance with her. But Lilith resigns herself to it, for she has difficulty imagining a situation that would be improved by Bright Shattered Ice’s company.

As though feeling her reticence, Desus turns to her. “I’m sure you must too tired for all of this,” he says, gesturing to the party. “I’ll make your excuses for you here and I’ll meet you at Uvanaru’s Manse later.” He takes her hand to bestow a quick kiss, giving her a dismissal. The Chrysanthemum Shogun, God of Health and Well-Being had graciously offered to host them in their time in Yu-Shan. Powerful though the Celestial Exalted are, they cannot stay in Yu-Shan without proper vouching, such as the jobs the Sidereals perform for the Maidens or the diplomatic missions of Eclipses. Left unspoken is when he will return, likely days later, as Yu-Shan has no regular cycle of days to interrupt those who revel under the leaderboard to the Games of Divinity that is the sky. Very much implied is Desus’ wish that she not follow or protest.

Lilith makes her smiles and feigns to the tiredness that she doesn’t feel. She waves her goodbyes at those who have come closer, hoping to speak to her about the fight she presumes. _This is also something Desus would like to avoid_ , she thinks to herself. As she has turned to leave, Desus leans in close, as though to whisper some lovers’ secret.

“You’ve done well. It’s a shame the measure didn’t pass.” He doesn’t even see her face as he turns back to his increasing crowd, grabbing two of the women with the least status by the ass as they squeal and weakly protest, following the ancient Solar to the legendary revels of the heavenly city.

Keeping her face calm, she finds herself a window and leaps, transforming as she flies into the night lit only by the sign of Jupiter and Yu-Shan’s city lamps. For once, she is happy that Desus will leave her to her own devices for what would be days in Creation. After knowing that, she wouldn’t be able to keep her composure with all of those people around her, looking to congratulate her.

Congratulate her on her loss of pride and dignity. Congratulate her on the blow to her ego and her name. Congratulate her on her botched attempt to play the games that Solars play. Congratulate her on her failure to herself, her fellow Lunars, and to her goddess.

At least in the Manse, no one will question her unhappiness. Uvunaru will know what troubles her, for that is his domain, but his court will think it is just the regret of losing in the finals. They will not know the feelings of her heart. They will not know how her regret and shame compounds, spreading over the feelings that muddle her mind. These are just another set of wounds that come from being married to Desus.


End file.
